I was running errands this morning when I realized it. May 9th…officially less than 3 months and my first born will be a Kindergardener. I took a deep breath as fearful questions bombarded my mind: What if he’s not ready? Will he be safe? Have I taught him enough? I have wrestled with putting Harley in school for a long time now, and not just because of his food allergies.
I fought to push the worry to the side and started praying. Memories of the last 5 years flooding my mind like an ocean and tugging hard at my heart strings. Then a thought came to my mind that I have no doubt came directly from the Lord.
Jochebed, the mother of Moses, spent three months hiding her baby boy to save him from being murdered. When he was too big to hide any longer, she sent him down a river in a basket. I’m sure she must have felt so nervous and terrified. Maybe she was even wishing he had been a girl instead of a boy so there would be no danger of losing her child.
What faith she must have had. What purpose she must have seen in her baby boy from day one. The bible says she saw he was special and kept him hidden. I believe she looked at him and could see God’s favor on him. She knew she had to save his life so that God could use him in a mighty way. She must have been so close to God…I admire her so.
Then it hit me like a tidal wave: My children are here for a reason. If I will simply put my trust in God, he will provide me the tools to prepare my kids to go out into the world and be a light. They have an opportunity to walk with a purpose. If every single christian parent kept their kids out of public schools, how would the truth be preserved?? Without Christ followers like them standing up for what’s right and living according to the word, God’s presence in schools will disappear. This is what helps to prevent God’s standards from falling away.
“Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hid. Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.” Matthew 5: 14-16
I know this is my answer. God’s way of showing me simultaneously how to hold on and let go. I’m aware this thought isn’t for everyone. School is such a private choice. So many options today; home school, public school, private school, maybe a combination of those. Each parent has to follow their own convictions. As for me, I finally got the answer and the peace I have needed for so long. God is calling me to be more like Jochebed: all this time putting Harley in school has felt a little like putting him in a basket and sending him down a river. But I can choose faith over fear. I can recognize what God has placed in my son, and trust that just like with Moses, the favor of God rests on him, and he can and will use him in mighty ways as well.
So my new prayer to pray….For God to give me the wisdom to teach Harley that he has the ability every day, through his words and actions, to give people a taste of the goodness of God. We can teach him how to draw people to Jesus. God isn’t a secret to be kept.
There are people all over this nation living in darkness. Families are a mess. Suicide is the number one injury death in America. People are searching for answers and if we all hide our children away in our christian homes and circles, they will have a hard time finding those answers. Aren’t we called to be his disciples? Didn’t they go out into the world to spread the good news? God has called us all to be lights, and we need to let them shine. The only chance our kids have at shining is if we allow them to go show others the love of God…A love that is slow to anger, that doesn’t judge, that believes and thinks the best, that doesn’t give up on people.
Because Moses had a mother who was full of faith and saw purpose in her children, an ENTIRE nation got to taste God’s goodness. They were brought out of darkness and into his marvelous light. Just imagine what schools could look like today if christian kids were encouraged to walk daily in their God-given purpose.
Next time I start to worry or second guess….I’ll go back to that scripture in Matthew and remind myself about the candle that can not be hid. One candle…It’s funny how it can light an entire room of darkness. Just one. Oh my special Harley, Go. Be that candle. Light up a room for Jesus and make this already proud Mama even more proud.